Mmm coffee. Coffee is good. We like coffee. Coffee coffee coffee.
Speaking of coffee: one of our only sisters or in-laws has a Ph.D. (for real) in coffee (ish). She has a Kickstarter for a film she wants to make called Ground. It basically follows the origin of how a plant becomes delicious go-go juice.
On a scale of 1 to America, how free are you tonight?
Robots.
It seems like they’re everywhere these days. Washing our cars, policing our streets, even entertaining our cats!
I’ll tell you, life sure was easier without them. Not in a literal sense, because who would vacuum the carpet?! But in a thoughtless, preachy, I-have-a-blurb-to-write sense, which I think is more meaningful.
But we know what the future looks like.
And we’re nothing if not attuned to the way the winds are blowing, so we’ve decided to jump ahead of the curve and curry some favor before everyone gets on the killbot bandwagon. We have a variety of options for the discerning robot, including t-shirts, ties, mugs, and cards featuring this vision of NEXT YEAR:
For the robot on the domestic front, we have this t-shirt of a robot doing his grocery shopping (I think we captured this terminator’s likeness perfectly):
It’s certain to persuade those meddlesome meatbags that you can be trusted with their EMP pulse generator, because no reason, you’re just curious about what’s inside, and you definitely won’t smash it beneath your mighty robo-feet.
If they’re still not persuaded, just hit them with this second robot grocery-store related item, a tote bag! It’s a design so nice we accidentally made it twice.
[Ed. note: The best part of this post is that we somehow got to re-use the “grocery-related designs” tag]
If you grew up when we did, playing Oregon Trail was pretty much mandatory. At least we learned a lot of survival skills from our play: ammo is more important than food; rabbits are impossible to shoot; and there is no way to get a wagon across a stream without potentially killing somebody. In fact, you pretty much can’t do anything without potentially killing somebody.
Well, we made a series of designs reflecting some of our favorite Oregon Trail moments. There’s the “Rampage” (don’t pretend like you haven’t done it):
(available as a dark t-shirt, light t-shirt, mouse pad, mug, notebook, bag, and playing cards)
The “Superman” (no human could manage such a feat!):
(available as a colored t-shirt, white t-shirt, apron, bag, and bumper sticker)
And the “Inevitable” (sorry about the cholera):
(make and customize your t-shirt here)
Get yourself some classic Oregon Trail gear, and don’t forget to pour a little out for all those buffalo left along the way.
[Ed. note: We are enormous fans of Arrested Development. We apologize in advance for the number of show references we are about to make.]
Caca-caca-caca-caw!
The Arrested Development chicken dance is one of its best gags.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zf2e8z7EoF8
We love it so much that we made a design showing off each family member’s signature move, available on t-shirts, mugs, mouse pads, and ties:
Maybe you could wear a tie to your new job as Mr. Manager? (We just say manager.) Or even better, show up in this spiffy t-shirt with this spiffy mug. You’re Mr. Manager now: the choice is up to you.
And last, but not least, it’s The Final Countdown. (Doo do doo do, do do doo do do.) Wearing this shirt can give anyone the illusion of success, since it has the kind of style you otherwise can only get from wearing a $3,000 suit. C’mon! Buy one.
And that’s why… you always buy Arrested Development products.
The fake mustache trend. Those of you who know us personally know how we feel about this. We were early adopters, and used mustaches as seating cards for the guests at our wedding. We own BeerMo Bottle Mustaches
Sure, the marketplace maybe over saturated with mustaches, and this trend may be fading, but in our hearts, the fake mustache will never die. Heck, even Dada artist Marcel Duchamp knew the greatness of the fake mustache (see above), way back in 1919.
Why wouldn’t you want to look like you have a mustache while drinking your morning cup of coffee?
Ah, much more distinguished. One might even say… presidential.
OK, the fake mustache might not be mature, but who cares. Treat yourself to a mustache mug and tune out the rest, because haters always gonna hate.
